||[Mar. 31st, 2009|01:17 am]
The majority of my calls at work are from the elderly or the disabled. I hear a lot of sad stories. I used to wonder why a lot of people that work in health care related fields seemed distant and detached to the point of almost being unfriendly.
I have a much better understanding now.
I spent two hours talking to a woman who needed to vent. A woman who lived alone, who had serious health and family stress, and who was concerned about her cat. Sometimes people need to talk. I get it.
What I don't get is how people who ask me what the right thing to do is every other sentence get along in life in the first place? She obviously had the skills to stay alive, live in an apartment, and own a cat. I would think that over 67 years of life she had to make decisions.
However, she wanted me to make all the decisions for her - from selecting her best health care plan down to whether or not she should go to the er in the evening instead of the morning. When I refused to make decisions for her - she kept going back to her poor health, her bleak situation, and how she had absolutely nothing in the world that brings her any joy.
I really wanted to say - why do you choose this? You are choosing how you feel, how you react, and your mindset. You are choosing to suffer instead of choosing to develop your resilience. Of course, the fucking company I work for does not have a "take responsibility for your own life" script that I can access and log.
I've suffered from depression. I've felt so overwhelmed that I remotely entertained suicidal thoughts. When I talk to people like this - I wonder what set of circumstances takes the fighting spirit out of them? What is it that makes people stop taking responsibility for their own lives.
*sigh* back to work.